Femininity & Feminism Survey, Part 3

Jen S.

How do you self-identify?

I'm a girl who's a 'mo.

If you most closely relate to femininity as a model of self-presentation, what does that concept mean for you?

People know I'm a girl but I tend to dress androgynous. I feel more feminine in a stereotypical way when I wear more feminine clothing like shirts with ruffles or smaller patterns like polka dots. But I usually don't feel comfortable dressing in anything other than t-shirts and jeans and I still feel feminine dressing in this manner.

Which of these words most closely relates to your identity: queer/femme/butch/lady/girlie/woman/dude/lesbian/gay/straight/andro/trans? (add other terms if necessary)

Andro describes my appearance the most.

Is a combination of these words necessary to define your self-identity?

When I call myself "androgynous," I'm still definitely a woman. It's important for people to know that I'm a woman. I've been mistaken for trans before and I have never identified as or felt trans.

How do you define "femininity"?

I was just thinking about that the other day about how it's based on appearance but...I don't know. Maybe I'd say, being in touch with your gender, being in touch with being a woman. Feeling comfortable with yourself as a woman. I don't think "feminine" should only apply to how you dress.

Do you see femininity as limiting or freeing? How do you argue for or against "traditional" forms of femininity?

I would like to think of femininity as freeing as long as it's not in the "traditional" form. I think a lot of people are afraid to identity with femininity because it's seen as being about one's appearance. I think a lot of people like me aren't seen as feminine or like to call themselves feminine because of how I look compared to the feminine ideal. But, I think that I am feminine even though I don't encompass some of the physical traits.

What does "femme" or "femininity" personally mean to you? Do you relate to these terms? Do you project your own definition onto these terms and re-define them?

I think I touched upon that in the above question. But, I think femininity should refer to being a female not to any specific duties, like house chores, or appearance.

I like women that are comfortable in their femininity. Being a lesbian makes you fit into weird categories. If you don't fit in a specific category, people don't know where to place you...

Can femininity be a revolutionary act?

Hell yeah! Because it should represent what it means to be a woman not just wearing dresses and lipstick. It should be. I'm aching for a new Riot Grrrl type of revolution. My new definition of femininity would be: believe in yourself as a lady and know that you are strong and capable.

Do you consider yourself a feminist? If yes, have you ever seen femininity as limiting to your feminism? If no, why not?

Yes, I'm a feminist! The way that femininity is portrayed is limiting since it's marketed to straight dudes. I want to change the definition of femininity to be synonymous with feminism.